Vladimir Putin’s War Room makes Dr. Strangelove War Room look Puny

Vladimir Putin’s massive, triple-decker war room.

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MOSCOW — “Gentlemen. You can’t fight in here. This is the war room!”

It could have been a scene straight out of “Dr. Strangelove” when President Vladimir V. Putin stepped into the Russian Ministry of Defense’s brand new, three-tiered, multibillion-dollar control center this week, for a war briefing that had its fair share of movie-like pageantry.

On movie-theater-size screens, live broadcasts showed long-range strategic bombers taking off from Russian air bases to fly sorties over Syria. Putin instructed commanders in Syria to “make contact with the French and work with them as allies” as Russia seeks a central role in a proposed anti-terrorist coalition.

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But the real star of the show may have been the building itself, which is designed to be a new nerve center for the Russian military that will coordinate military action around the world, including ballistic missile launches and strategic nuclear deployments.

The building is roughly the equivalent of the U.S. National Military Command Center used by the Pentagon, but as one Russian state news agency noted in a breathless headline this week, “Russian Defense Data Center Outperforms US Facility Threefold: Official.”

The center, which is fortified and said to sit on top of a maze of underground tunnels, is on the Frunze Naberezhnaya on the left bank of the Moscow river, a little over two miles from Red Square.

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It was finished in 2014 and is part of a massive, decade-long modernization of Russia’s army, which has cost hundreds of billions of dollars, but has also produced noted improvements, from the expertise of Russian troops deployed during the Crimea operation to the recent cruise missile strikes launched from the Caspian Sea.

The new national defense center also includes a helicopter pad that was deployed on the Moscow River late last year and can accommodate Russia’s Mi-8 transport helicopter. In case of a war, it would be the country’s premier communications center, and one Russian commander compared it to the military headquarters of the Soviet Union during World War II.

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Another room with a large round table and more giant monitors.

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Minister of Defense Sergei Shoigu said that the center is a step toward “forming a single information space for solving tasks in the interests of the country’s defense.”

As Worldviews noted during Russia’s International Army Games in August, Russia’s military has sought to raise its public profile through savvy media branding.

At the briefing, army personnel sat in color-coded rows with matching headsets and water bottles bearing the Russian army brand (their flagship store recently opened on Tverskaya Street here, Moscow’s equivalent of Fifth Avenue). The briefing was covered on Russian national television from at least four distinct camera angles.

Andrei Kolesnikov, a reporter who has covered Putin for the past 15 years and is known for his lyrical, fawning reports of the Russian president, waxed introspective as he covered the briefing Tuesday.

“When this building and this room were opened a year ago, I was somewhat perplexed: Yes, it all looks very persuasive, and the Pentagon might even only dream of something like this, if only in a nightmare. But why? Who will need these screens the size of small soccer fields with grandstands for viewers?

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“And here was the answer. Every spot was filled. Russia’s entire high army command were the viewers. Or was it like the warming bench, and at any moment everyone was ready to go on the field …”

Later in the piece, he added: “My soul of course was not filled with delight and trembling at the hellish power of this armada. But I was perturbed, yes, I was.”

The War Rooms from the movies take a backseat to this giant high-tech cavern.

Dr. Strangelove

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WarGames 1983

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‘You Only Live Twice”, James Bond.

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Loose Kangaroo Confounds Cops in Denmark

Authorities in Denmark are on the hunt for a loose kangaroo that was spotted by a motorist who filmed the out-of-place creature hopping through a field. Footage of the weird encounter was shared by South Zealand and Lolland-Falster Police in a Facebook post on Monday. Joking that the “morning driver had to rub his sleep out of his eyes” when he saw the mysterious marsupial, they indicated that the strange sighting had occurred earlier that day near the community of Øster Ulslev on the island of Lloland. Perhaps thinking that no one would believe him, the motorist managed to capture a brief video of the kangaroo before it hopped out of view from the vehicle.

As one might imagine, cops are confused as to how a kangaroo wound up roaming the island since no one has reported such a noticeable creature having gone missing. However, as news of Monday’s sighting spread throughout the community, several people came forward with claims that the marsupial has actually been living in the area for quite awhile. “We see it from time to time, four or five times a week it comes bouncing,” resident Morten Friis nonchalantly told a local media outlet, “it has been here for several years, it is nothing new.” He went on to laugh that “it is very funny, many stop and are completely incomprehensible, and think they see visions. Then we say calmly, ‘it’s just the kangaroo you’ve seen.'”

The possibility that such a creature could make its home on the island is not completely out of the question, wildlife expert Anne Sofie Meilvang said, “even though kangaroos are associated with the warm climate in Australia, the Danish weather does not scare them.” She went on to explain that the animal subsists on a diet of “grass, herbs, bark and leaves,” which can be found in abundance in the area. While the kangaroo may have managed to adapt to living on Lloland, one suspects that its time in the wild may sadly soon come to an end now that its presence in the area has come to light and animal welfare workers are on the lookout for the creature.

Russian Navy Jet Does Really Fast Low Pass

The Sukhoi Su-33 is an all-weather carrier-based highly maneuverable air defence fighter based on the Su-27 “Flanker” and initially known as Su-27K. It has larger (folding) wings, upgraded engines, twin nose wheel, strengthened undercarriage for blue waters ops.

The following video show a Russian Navy Su-33 at some airbase in Russia, performing a couple of really low passes buzzing the cameraman. Cool footage, probably not too safe.

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Theaviationist.com

Kooky Alarm Clocks

If you snooze you lose goes the old adage. Getting up early and starting the day bright eyed and bushy tailed is the way to success for the go-getters out there. The downside is having to get disrupted out of deep sleep by noisy contraptions. Here are some strange alarm clocks that will force a person to jump into the rat race at full speed.

The Sub Morning cleverly lures you to the bathroom, by forcing you to submerge it in water

Once you get to the bathroom, you’re basically in the shower already and, once you’re in the shower, the day has officially begun.

Clocky leaps off your nightstand and runs away, making you chase it around the room to shut off the damn beeping.

This sneaky little thing forces both your body and your wits into action.

Target Alarm Clock

If you are a sucker for shooting games, you must try this Target alarm clock. The rules are easy: the clock will sound the alarm based on the time you set, and you need to stop it by using the laser target gun to shoot the bullseye.

I.Q. test first thing in the morning

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This Sonic Grenade alarm clock is guaranteed to get your sleepy children out of bed. Just pull the pin, throw the grenade into the room and get out of the way as it emits an ear-piercing noise.

The Rocket Launcher alarm clock will really “launch” you from your bed. When the alarm goes off, it shoots a rocket off in your room, and the only way to turn it off is to locate the rocket and place it back on the launch pad.

The toughest part about waking up for many people is physically getting out of bed. Luckily, the Carpet Alarm Clock helps you work through the hard part, by forcing you to stand up and step on the mat to turn it off.