Wildwood Weed

Legalization of cannabis in Canada next July. Bloody Manitoba government won’t let us grow our own. Greedy politicians.

The name of this song is ‘The Wildwood Flower’
Now ‘The Wildwood Flower’ is an old country classic
It gained a whole new popularity
The song isn’t any more popular
But the flower is doin’ real good

The wildwood flower grew wild on the farm
And we never knowed what it was called
Some said it was a flower and some said it was weed
I didn’t gave it much thought…
One day I was out there talking to my brother
Reached down for a weed to chew on
Things got fuzzy and things got blurry
And then everything was gone
I Didn’t know what happened
But I knew it beat the hell out of sniffin’ burlap

I come to and my brother was there
And he said, ‘What’s wrong with your eyes?’
I said, ‘I don’t know, I was chewing on a weed’
He said, ‘Let me give it a try’
We spent the rest of that day and most of that night
Trying to find my brother, Bill
Caught up with him ’bout six o’clock the next mornin’
Naked, swinging on the windmill
He said he flew up there
I had to fly up and get him down
He was about half crazy

The very next day we picked a bunch of them weeds
And put ’em in the sun to dry
Then we mashed ’em up and we cleaned ’em all
And put ’em in the corncob pipe
Smokin’ them wildwood flowers got to be a habit
We didn’t see no harm
We thought it was kind of handy
Take a trip and never leave the farm

A big ol’ puff on the wildwood weed
Next thing you know
We’s just wandering behind the little animals
All good things gotta come to an end
And it’s the same with the wildwood weed

One day this feller from Washington come by
And he spied us and he turned white as a sheet
And he dug and he burned
And he burned and he dug
And he killed all our cute little weeds
Then he drove away
We just smiled and waved
Sittin’ there on that sack of seeds

Y’all come back now, ya hear

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Actual Used Car Vending Machine in Nashville

Online used car retailer Carvana, which has revolutionized how people buy cars, is back with another innovation — the world’s first coin operated car vending machine that can dispense cars in a fully automated process. The five-story glass tower, which can house as many as 20 used cars at a time, stands on Interstate 65 in the US city of Nashville, in Tennessee. Carvana said the move was to simplify the car delivery process, and at the same time make picking up the car an experience for the buyer.

Carvana, a technology start-up based in Phoenix, has been selling used cars online since 2013. Typical of online shopping sites, Carvana allows customers to browse its selection of used cars online with high-resolution photos and 360-degree virtual tours. Once a vehicle is selected, customers can get financing, trade in a vehicle, and sign contracts — everything done online. The car is then delivered to the door or picked up from the company’s store. Buyers get a 7-days test-drive period after which they can return the car if they aren’t satisfied.

 

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The online model has allowed Carvana to cut down on staff and overhead, and according to its own estimates, save customers around US$2,000 in the process. Now with the new vending machine, even the pickup is unmanned.

Customers buy the car online, like before, and then proceed to the vending machine as soon as their car is ready to pickup. Upon entry into the lobby, the customer receives an oversized coin that they place into a slot. The coin triggers an automated process where a machine spins and grabs the vehicle, bringing it to a track that delivers the car to one of three bays. The entire process is accompanied by a grand light and sound show.

Those customers who live outside Nashville but want to pick up from the vending machine, Carvana will subsidize $200 in airfare and arrange transportation from the airport to the Nashville facility.

 

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Yet another male celebrity accused of sexual impropriety

The accusations are seeping out of the woodwork fast and furious. From Harvey Weinstein to Kevin Spacey to Louis C.K., sexual misconduct reports have become a non-stop cascade in the last couple weeks. And now another bombshell.

A well known pitchman for cat food is now under the microscope. Morris the Cat is accused of improper sexual advances towards Hollywood female felines.

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Morris the Cat is the advertising mascot for 9Lives brand cat food, appearing on its packaging and in many of its television commercials.

Morris has appeared in other media over the years. He debuted in the Robert Altman film The Long Goodbye with Elliott Gould, and starred in the movie Shamus with Burt Reynolds and Dyan Cannon in 1973.
Morris also appears as a “spokescat” promoting responsible pet ownership, pet health and pet adoptions through animal shelters. To this end, he has “authored” three books: The Morris Approach, The Morris Method and The Morris Prescription. He was quoted at the 1993 “end of year” edition of People magazine which noted deaths of 1993 to which he quoted a simple “Meow” in honor of the death of his friend, fellow advertising mascot, the dog Spuds MacKenzie.
In 2006, Morris was depicted as adopting a kitten, Li’l Mo, from a Los Angeles animal shelter, representing the first adoptee in a campaign known as Morris’s Million Cat Rescue.

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Six pussies have come forward with court dipositions alleging that Morris performed groping and unwanted sexual advances towards them in his Hollywood cat-house. Morris had lured the pussy cats to his house on the pretext of unlimited moist cat food, namely 9Lives.

Morris with one of his more recent lady friends

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A few of the accusers. They have signed a tell all contract with Buzzfeed media.

Caty Purry alleges that Morris kept pawing her behind even after she hissed continuously at him.

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Cindy Clawford put out a statement alleging Morris bit her ears while she was reading a script at his Tijuana villa.

GLAMOUR CAT

Lickers Wigglebutt has put forward court documents accusing Morris of unwanted pouncing and groping with his claws that left her an emotional basket case.

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Morris meowed no comment as his lawyer Bengal Tom said the accusations are sour grapes and that no such bad behavior ever happened. “Morris is an upstanding citizen and highly recognized professional actor” Tom put forward in a statement to reporters. “He could have had all the pussy he wanted”, no need for excessive advances on Morris’s part”.

 

Price soars after filmmaker’s spoof used car ad goes viral

Spoof Honda adImage copyrightFULARIOUSTV/YOUTUBE
Image captionMr Lanman hired an actress to play his girlfriend.

Squint and it could be a real car ad.

With sweeping aerial shots and professional-looking production, Max Lanman’s advert for a Honda Accord wouldn’t look out of place on TV.

But the Accord in question is a used 1996 model owned by Mr Lanman’s girlfriend, with 141,095 miles on the clock and a $499 (£380) price tag.

When she wanted to sell, filmmaker Mr Lanman applied his talents to produce a spoof ad, and it may have paid off – bids on Ebay currently top $100,000.

Whether that transpires to be a real bid remains to be seen, but the ad has gone viral and the old car, nicknamed Greenie, looks set to go for far more than the price advertised in the short film.

The ad, with a cinematic voice-over which parodies the real deal, features an actress driving the car in LA.

There are close-ups of a vintage-looking tape-deck, as well as rubber duckies and a coffee pot strapped into the passenger seat.

“You, you’re different,” the narrator says, as the ad begins. “You do things your way. That’s what makes you one of a kind.”

The one-minute spot culminates with its own spoof tongue in cheek tagline: “Luxury is a state of mind”.

Still from Honda Accord adImage copyrightFULARIOUSTV/YOUTUBE
Image captionSweeping drone shots advertise the car’s mileage
Spoof Honda car adImage copyrightFULARIOUSTV/YOUTUBE
Image captionBids on Ebay – real or not – have apparently topped $100,000

“The inspiration to make the ad came while my girlfriend Carrie and I were driving up the coast on Highway 1, heading to Big Sur to go camping,” Mr Lanman told the BBC.

“It dawned on me that it would be really funny to film a car commercial for a really crappy car against such a gorgeous backdrop.”

It was an “absolutely insane” experience watching the spoof ad go viral, Mr Lanman said.

“It is surreal to think that something that I made with my friends, that two days ago sat on my computer, is now being watched around the world. Thank God for the internet.”

Max and friendImage copyrightMAX LANMAN
Image captionMr Lanman and a friend set up a camera on the back of a truck