Spaceball One: An Amazing Spaceship

Spaceballs is a 1987 American science fiction parody film co-written, produced and directed by Mel Brooks. Starring Brooks, Bill Pullman, John Candy, and Rick Moranis, the film also features Daphne Zuniga, Dick Van Patten, and the voice of Joan Rivers. In addition to Brooks in a supporting role, the film also features Brooks regulars Dom DeLuise and Rudy De Luca in cameo appearances.

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Lord Dark Helmet

The film was released by Metro-Goldwyn-Mayer on June 24, 1987, and was met with a mixed reception. It has since become a cult classic on video and one of Brooks’s most popular films. Its setting and characters parody the original Star Wars trilogy, as well as other sci-fi franchises including Star Trek, Alien, and the Planet of the Apes films.

One of the best parts of this movie is Spaceball One. A giant spaceship attack platform. It’s big, very big.

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11,000 meters long

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The original model.

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This item is the massive 17 ft version model of the Spaceball One ship created for the 1987 Mel Brooks’ Star Wars comedy spoof Spaceballs. The model is constructed of styrene and resin, and detailed with kit bashed model parts. It features fiber optic lighting throughout. Spaceballs spoofs much of the design of Star Wars, and this ship is a spoof based of the Empire Star Destroyer. The effects work was done by Apogee Inc., company headed by John Dykstra that split off from ILM in 1978. Thus, Spaceballs marked the first time since Star Wars that the two units shared work on a single project, as Industrial Light and Magic was hired to create the puppet of the chest-burster for Spaceballs. On this movie the Chief Model Makers were Grant McCune, Chris Ross, David Beasley, Cory Faucher, Jay Roth, John Eaves, Tom Pahk, David Sosalla, Suzy Schneider, and Smokey Stover. The Model Department Special Design was run by Rae Burkland, Ron Thornton.

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One of the Craziest Songs Ever

“MacArthur Park” is a song written and composed by Jimmy Webb. Richard Harris was the first to record the song in 1968: his version peaked at number two on the Billboard Hot 100 chart and number four on the UK Singles Chart. “MacArthur Park” was subsequently covered by numerous artists, including a hit version in 1969 by country music singer Waylon Jennings. Among the best-known covers is Donna Summer’s disco arrangement from 1978 which topped the Billboard Hot 100.
“MacArthur Park” has been called the worst song ever written. Its flowery lyrics and metaphors (notoriously likening lost love to a cake left out in the rain) have been described as “bloated” and “loopy.” Webb commented: “Those lyrics were all very real to me: there was nothing psychedelic about it to me. The cake, it was an available object. It was what I saw in the park at the birthday parties.”

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Lyrics

Spring was never waiting for us, girl
It ran one step ahead
As we followed in the dance
Between the parted pages and were pressed
In love’s hot, fevered iron
Like a striped pair of pants
[CHORUS:]
MacArthur’s Park is melting in the dark
All the sweet, green icing flowing down
Someone left the cake out in the rain
I don’t think that I can take it
‘Cause it took so long to bake it
And I’ll never have that recipe again
Oh no!
I recall the yellow cotton dress
Foaming like a wave
On the ground around your knees
The birds, like tender babies in your hands
And the old men playing checkers by the trees
[CHORUS]
There will be another song for me
For I will sing it
There will be another dream for me
Someone will bring it
I will drink the wine while it is warm
And never let you catch me looking at the sun
And after all the loves of my life
After all the loves of my life
You’ll still be the one
I will take my life into my hands and I will use it
I will win the worship in their eyes and I will lose it
I will have the things that I desire
And my passion flow like rivers through the sky.
And after all the loves of my life
After all the loves of my life
I’ll be thinking of you
And wondering why
[Chorus]
Oh no
No no
Oh No!

 

Tiger Drone Wars

An endeavor aimed at providing exercise for the animals at a Siberian Tiger enclosure in China wound up with a drone turning into a chew toy for the monstrous creatures.

In a remarkable video of the encounter, viewers are afforded an incredible glimpse of the majestic big cats as a UAV buzzes overhead and narrowly escapes the curious tigers as they chase after it.

The amazing perspective is probably as close as one can come to what it must be like for unfortunate prey that find themselves in the animals’ sights.

Eventually, the drone dips too low to the ground and one of the ferocious felines leaps into the air and takes the vehicle out.

Were there a tiny pilot aboard the craft, it would not have lasted very long as the tigers tear away at the pesky drone that was taunting them.

Although it may seem a bit cruel to engage with the creatures in such a fashion, the directors of the facility use the ‘game’ to help provide some exercise for the tigers as they have gotten somewhat pudgy from living in safe confines of preserve.

With that in mind, expect the ‘drone dash’ to become America’s next workout craze sometime around the summer.

Donald Trump getting tanned at Nuclear Fuel Processing Facility

The Donald has never been not known for being vain. He loves himself. In his mind he is every woman’s dream man. He always wants to look pretty for the ladies. Enter the tan. It has been reported by the Washington Gloober newspaper that Trump is now getting tanned at a federal nuclear facility outside of Baltimore. And what a tan it is! This guy must get all the ladies.

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Stewart MaClean boring crowds in heaven

Stuart MacLean puts lackadaisical inside of boredom wrapped in watching paint dry.  This guy is dry boring.  Stuart is a radio show phenom in senior citizen homes across Canada.  His show, The Vinyl Café, is on CBC radio every Sunday at noon.  I have tried to listen to it, but I fall asleep every time. The show is monotonous, tedious, irksome, tiresome, humdrum and so lacking in anything interesting that it should be bottled as a new super sedative.

The Vinyl Café is a complete rip-off of Garrison Keillor’s A Prairie Home Companion, a show from south of the border.  Vinyl Café is all about Stuart’s storytelling.  Real fluff. An example is: Morley and Dave went grocery shopping, on the way Morley realized he forgot to put underwear on, Dave said that’s okay, I’ll give you mine, then a cat crossed under a step ladder and all hell broke loose. By all hell we mean Morley and Dave heard a siren in the distance. Morley said I sure hope that cute granny who lives in the red house didn’t do anything wrong.  This made Dave laugh so hard he shit his pants, thereby not allowing him to give Morley his shorts.

When Morley and Dave got home they realized they forgot laundry detergent. Morley said Dave you will have to wash those crappy shorts with toothpaste. As Morley said this Dave was taking a drink from his glass of milk, Dave burst into uncontrollable laughter causing him to regurgitate his milk through his nose.  This caused Morley to pass out. And so it goes. Boring insignificant blather.

How this show has remained popular is one of the great mysteries of the universe. Mind you the audiences that Stuart plays to are generally rural hicks who revere Don Knotts and the TV show Family Feud. No Jon Stewart crowd here. Stuart gets his biggest audiences in Yellowknife, Kamloops, Selkirk and Weyburn for example.  He isn’t too popular in the big cities. He has a country audience. The ruralites will stop combining during harvest to load up the family and drive to the parish hall to listen to Stuart’s gabble.

I wish CBC would fire Stuart and put on something else. Stuart could make a living reading story books to horses in labour. His soothing delivery would make the mares relax and have no trouble farting out the colt. I rest my case.

Don’t have to fire poor Stuart. He’s dead. This is rough for me to stay, but good riddance, this idiot was a super-wimp! I hate wimps.

 

Kum Koon Garden Restaurant in Winnipeg closed for Rodent Infestation

DAVID LIPNOWSKI / WINNIPEG FREE PRESS FILES</p><p>Kum Koon Garden Restaurant was one of 20 food-service establishments and hotel pools shuttered since last September because of health code violations.</p>
 

Kum Koon Garden Restaurant was one of 20 food-service establishments and hotel pools shuttered since last September because of health code violations.